What should you do if a friend owes you money?
Perhaps you took out a loan or bought something with your credit card for them because you had a better credit rating. Or perhaps you just lent them the money. And now they aren’t repaying you.
It would have been better to have thought all this through BEFORE lending the money… research has shown that nearly a third of people have fallen out with a friend or family member over an unpaid debt of £100 or less.
Before you take legal action, you need to consider two things:
- are you likely to win your case?
- does your friend have any money?
This article looks at whether it is sensible to take legal action and how you would do it in England or Wales. If you live in Scotland or Northern Ireland, the small claims processes are different – contact your local Citizens Advice office to find out about them.
Can you show you are owed the money?
To win a case, you need to have some evidence that your friend owes you money. This doesn’t have to be a written legal contract, with witnesses etc. Suing someone for money is a civil case and the judge will decide who wins “on the balance of probabilities”, looking at whose story seems most likely.
You can have a valid legal contract if it was just a spoken agreement between the two of you. But there does need to be something you can show. If you gave your friend £200 in cash and no-one saw you do this, you are going to have problems with this part…
If your friend denies you ever gave them the money or whatever you bought on their behalf, is there someone who was there when you discussed the loan? Do you have an email from your friend saying they are broke and could you help them out? Was the sofa delivered to your friend’s house not yours? Does your bank statement show a transfer to your friend’s account?
If the friend started making some repayments but then stopped, if these show in your bank account or if the friend was making the repayments on your credit card, that is good evidence that there was some sort of loan.
If you aren’t sure whether what you have is going to be “good enough”, then you could go to your local Citizens Advice Bureau and see what they think.
Was it a loan or a gift?
If your friend says the object was a present, does this seem plausible? Friends don’t usually give each other furniture or a car for Christmas.
But partners do give each other gifts, sometimes expensive ones. And parents may give a child a large sum as a deposit for a house.
If a gift seems plausible, the key facts in a court are likely to be whether there is any written evidence that the money was expected to be repaid. If some repayments were made, that suggests the money was not a gift, for example. See this newspaper article My ex says he will take me to court if I don’t pay him back thousands of pounds he gifted me to buy a new car which looks at one case.
Can your friend really afford to repay you?
If your friend has no money or assets, there is little point in taking them to court. Suppose you win the case – your friend now has a County Court Judgment (CCJ) but they may still not give you the money. They could apply to the court and offer you £5 a month say, which the court will agree to if that is all they can afford. Or they could just ignore the judgment!
If they have a house with a lot of equity, or a car that is worth something – not one bought on car finance – or a well-paid job, then there are ways that you can “enforce the court judgment” and get the money that you are owed, but these will:
- all cost you money;
- some, such as bailiffs, may well not work; and
- getting a charge over their house will not get you the money until it is sold. It is very, very rare to be able to force someone to sell their house.
This is a really hard decision to take because it feels so unfair.
But if your friend is in financial difficulty, getting a CCJ is very probably pointless. You will have wasted the court fees and not gained anything.
A more practical alternative may be to be sympathetic to your friend’s problems and ask them if they can pay you a small amount every week or month. Something is better than nothing…
What if you don’t know where your friend is?
If your friend seems to have moved, isn’t answering your calls and no-one knows where they are, this is very bad news. You can still sue them using their last address and win the case.
But that doesn’t mean you will get any money! If you don’t know where they are your chance of being able to “enforce” the court judgment are close to zero. The courts aren’t going to help you locate someone, nor will the police.
There is simply no point in pursuing this unless there is a lot of money involved, you have a very good case AND you know they have a lot of assets. Often the best you can do is assemble all the evidence you would have produced in court about the debt and keep it in a file, in case they reappear.
How do you sue someone?
Citizen’s Advice has a good guide about this.
The first step is to try to sort it out before going to court. You need to send your friend a “letter before action”, there is a template in the Citizens Advice guide. This letter needs to be posted and you should keep proof of posting.
It needs to give your friend a set period, usually a couple of weeks, to reply. This may seem frustratingly slow if you think they are going to ignore it, but it has to be done.
Sometimes a formal letter makes someone see sense and come up with a proposal for repayments. If they say they will repay say £40 a month, unless you are sure they can afford more, it might be wise to accept it rather than risk going to court.
After that you need to put in your “claim”. This can be on paper but it is most easily done using the Money Claim Online (MCOL) service. You shouldn’t need a solicitor to do this, but your local Citizens Advice can help if necessary.
There will only need to be a court hearing if your friend decides to defend the claim.
What does it cost?
If you sue someone you have to pay court fees at the start. The amount depends on the amount of money you are claiming. Issuing a claim for up to 300 costs £35 for example. There will be extra charges if there is hearing or if you need to try to enforce the judgment.
You may be able to get help with these fees if you are on a very low income.
In theory you get your costs back if you win as they are added onto what your friend owes. But this may not work if you don’t know where they are or they simply ignore the judgment.
Other FAQs
Can I sell my debt to a debt collector? No, debt collection agencies would not be interested in buying this sort of private debt.
Can’t the police sue them and get my money back? No, the police will tell you this is a “civil” matter, not a “criminal” matter. They will probably suggest you go to your local Citizens Advice – which is a good suggestion!
What about money someone owes me outside the UK? Sorry, I have no idea. You need to take local advice.
How much will my credit score change if…
Apps that make managing money easier
Problems paying your council tax
Nirvana says
Hi, I loaned an ex partner £450 back in December and they have paid £250 of it but now that we are not dating I am being more firm with them requesting dates and instalments per month but they are refusing to give me dates of when they can pay. They have been very vague with timescales previously by saying they will pay in a couple of weeks and a month’s time for example but have failed to meet that. I have all messages and transactions evidence online and I have sent a letter informing them I will take legal action after avoiding my latest messages that they need to respond and come to a reasonable agreement. They decided to get in touch but again failed to get specific dates and how much they can pay per month. I have visited citizens advice, looked into mediation, offered payment plans etc. I feel that court is my only option. My disadvantages of taking this to court are that unfortunately I don’t have a formal contract letter before I lended the money and that I have given them far too many chances to pay. Is it really worth going to court with my evidence? Or would it be better to just let it go completely or apologise to them for threatening court and continue to be patient on their terms. Thank you…
Sara (Debt Camel) says
It’s a very hard decision. Unless you KNOW they can afford to pay you, then court will just add to your costs and may not get any money back.
Nirvana says
Thank you for your response
Darren Brian Thompson says
I was a executor of my dad’s will wen he passed away he was on benifits and had savings of over 42000, once the bank had transferred the savings to me I distributed the amount to my two sisters so we had 14000 each, I have bank statements to proof this. The dwp then came after me to pay back overpayment as I’m not on benefits and didn’t have a clue about this I went to court and my dad was found not guilty as he thought the money he saved was nothing to do with declaring savings, as this was all money he saved which the dwp gave him and 15000from my mum when she passed away. As I said it went to court and I still had to pay 14000 back, the money had been distributed and spent so have a agreement with the dwp to pay 130 a month which I do. My sisters after arguing with them accepted that we all had this and would help pay even if it was 20 a month, I now after a year get nothing and all I get is they can’t afford it. Can I take them to court to help me pay this back and clear it
Sara (Debt Camel) says
I suggest you go to your local citizens advice and they will help you look at this situation.
V Patel says
Hi,
I loaned my friend £500 due to saving his car from being crushed due to not driving with insurance. I transferred this through online banking of which I have the statements to prove this. This happened back in FEBRUARY 2019 which is over 6 months. What is the best way to proceed? I have asked him when I would be receiving the repayment and his response is either “idk” or just doesn’t reply. I gave the money due to him telling me he would repay within 3 days back in FEBRUARY but have been spun a story. I even offered to go on Judge Rinder where they would pay off his debt to but his reaction was “I’m calm”.
What is the best way to proceed?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
The article above outlines your options. Your local Citizens Advice can help you look at these if you want.
Pauline says
Hi
Hi
I lone a friend £1500 to help with his bothers funerals cost, which was 1 year and 10 months a go. On three occasions he has promised to pay back the money owed to me but has failed to do so. We work together and now he has stop talking to me at all which is his a way of avoiding me. The money was bank transfer and I have message from him saying how much he appreciated my help.
What should I do next? and if I do have to write a formal letter asking for my money back, where can I find a letter like this as I just want this to be over now. Many thanks for your help Pauline
Sara (Debt Camel) says
The article describes what you need to think about. If you go to your local Citizens Advice they may be able to help you.
Giovanni Manfredi says
Hi
I lent a friend at work about five months ago £200 and since he has promised to pay me several times but when date approaches he doesn’t full full the agreement, the money I loaned I sent it him with a bank transfer and wrote Loan on the the reason for the transfer, what’s the easiest and quickest way to get this money back?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Ask him for payments of £50? Unless you are sure he can afford the lot, there isn’t much yiu can do.
Cara H says
Hello, I lend £730 total to a guy I have been seeing and he paid me back about £100 two weeks ago but when I mentioned that I need the rest of the money back urgent soon for my tuition fee, he started ignoring me. I am concerned that there is no direct transaction for the money he owes me. I paid £130 for a rented car for him that was rented out under his name and rest of the £600 by cash (I took it out from the ATM). However, there are messaged between us that confirms the money he owes me. Is it possible for me to sue him in the worst case scenario if he doesn’t contact me and refuses to pay? Thank you so much for the help in advance.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
As the article above says you need to think about whether you would be likely to win a court case and whether he has the money to pay you… going to court can be a slow procedure if he decides to contest the case it could take a long while. And if he refuses to pay after winning a court case you then have the problem about how to enforce the court decision.
It may be a more practical approach to ask him to pay you at £100 a month.
Laura says
Hi
I am due a refund of £500 for a PT as he was unable to fulfil the remaining training sessions due to him getting a job over seas. This happened in March and he had agreed to pay this money back once he was settled in June. 3 months on I am still chasing the PT, I have been given various excuses over this time but still no money.
As he is now working overseas do I still have grounds to take this to the courts?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
The problem is, winning a court case doesn’t necessarily mean you will get paid :(
It can be hard to “enforce” a court order in this country. Abroad youmay we’ll find it expensive or impossible.
Christian says
This sounds quite outlandish…. However lets begin. I’ve received a £200 payment off a friend as they had stayed at mine while under the influence of alcohol and ended up wetting the bed and mattress.
We agreed for my friend to pay £250 towards a new mattress which I was given £200 last week via bank transfer. I have all of this evidence in text messages the agreed amount etc… However since then they have asked for it back and are claiming legal action if they don’t get it.
I know if I do give them it back I won’t get anything off them for a second time. I’m surprised they transferred the £200 in the 1st place
Sara (Debt Camel) says
You could go and talk to Citizens Advice about your situation if you feel worried.
michelle ashbrook says
I borrowed money off a friend I now owe her £1650 out of £5000 but cant afford to pay her the £200 a month she is asking right now .I am a single parent (now want when first borrowed money ) and only get paid 500 a month which I have to pay rent and other essisal Bill’s with . I have tried talking to her but she keeps threatening me with court proceedings what di I do
Sara (Debt Camel) says
You should be getting help with your housing costs through housing benefit or Universal Credit – are you?
H Patel says
Hi,
I have paid my friend’s uni fees which were £15000. It was 2 years ago. Now she denying to pay me back. She finished her study and lives in India.
I know her address and everything. but she doesn’t want to pay me. I transferred amount in her account. What are the options I have? please advise.
Many thanks
Sara (Debt Camel) says
I am sorry, I have no idea how you could enforce any debt in India
Karen says
Hi
I loaned a boyfriend £20k over two years for his debts and his living expenses. Over £16k is via bank transfers and there is a few repayments back in to my account. I have a spreadsheet with it all itemised and an email from him confirming he wants to pay every penny back now we’ve split. He has no way of paying it back. No job and not one on the horizon. As he has confirmed via email he intends paying back what’s on the spreadsheet would I be able to put a charge over his property so if he sells in the future I will be able to get via equity in the house. I don’t want to ask his permission to do so either. The house is mortgaged and already has two charges over it from two debt companies. Advice in how to try and get something back in the future would be helpful as there is not a chance of a monthly repayment from him.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
To get a charge over his house you first have to go to court with a Money Claim to get a CCJ, then apply for a charging order. An online Money Claim for 16k of debt would cost you £720. Then another £110 for a court application for a charging order. He, of course, can defend both claims, you may feel you need a solicitor to help you.
The mortgage and the other two existing charges will have priority if he sells his house. You need to be very sure there will be enough equity to cover all them and pay you to start this expensive and uncertain process.
Kate says
Hi
My mum has told me she’s taking me to court because she accused me of taking money out of her account please done statement then all there investigations but proved I didn’t take money out now she’s say I owe her 1200 pounds there is no written contract or any thing now do I stand on this please
Sara (Debt Camel) says
i think you need someone to look at the details of your situation. that can’t be me. I suggest you go to your local Citizens Advice.
Sarah says
I stupidly sold my dog to a couple and let them pay me only part of the amount until they next got paid, I have texts off them to say they’d pay the rest but now have nearly 2 month pass and still no payment they have not been answering messages and we have been to their house once to ask about it and left my bank details but still no payment is there anything I can do
Sara (Debt Camel) says
You could go to your local Citizens Advice. They could help you draft a Letter Before Action – that will sometimes make people take a debt seriously. CAB can also talk about what your options are if the letter is ignored.
Sue says
Hi, I loaned my daughters ex fiancé two amounts of money, the first £1200 for an engagement ring and secondly £230 for him to clear an outstanding debt. The £1200 I drew out of my bank account in cash and have a receipt for the ring, stating paid cash. I asked the ex fiancé to pay me back the £1200 but he replied in a text that he acknowledges the amount he owes but claimed it’s only £850. He then asked me what the other 230 was for and I reminded him that it was to clear a debt. I have it on a bank statement transferred to his bank account. I have never received any repayment for any of the loans. What should I do.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
You could send him copies of the receipt and your bank statement and ask him to make an arrangement to pay you £ a month if you don’t think he can afford to pay it all now?
Sue says
Thankyou for your reply
Janet says
Hi
I loaned my friends son £2700 as he has his own business and said it would be for 1 week once some cheques had cleared. He keeps giving me excuses for not having the money. It’s been a month now. Please advise me what I can do? I am a single mother with 2 children and only had a bit of money from my inheritance.
Thank you janet
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Read the article above. Could you ask him to pay say £200 a month?
Donna Smith says
Hi, my husband borrowed a work colleague £1000 last year. My husband felt sorry for his kids as they wouldn’t have no presents for Christmas. His colleague said he was waiting for an insurance claim to come through so would pay him back with that. This was last year and haven’t seen a penny from him as yet. Husband has been asking him about it and is still coming out with excuses that he’s still waiting to hear about claim. This colleague works overtime every single weekend, so can’t understand why he hasn’t even offered to pay anything. How do we go about getting the money back. He’s stopped speaking to my husband now because he asked him about it last week.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
This is such a difficult situation. read the article above. Your husband could suggest that he will accept say £100 a month? Perhaps better to get some money coming back? Or go to your local Citizens Advice and ask for help.
R says
Have lent an associate £120 in two installments via bank transfer on consecutive days. Have all personsal details name, address etc… and transaction details via bacs. How can I leagally get my debt repayed as continually asking via text/email has not worked
Many thanks
R
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Read the article above which looks at your options and what you need to think about. I am sorry but there may be no easy solution.
Nawaz says
Hi, I lent a work colleague £4000 in 2 installments via a bank transfer £2000 each 4 years ago, we also drafted up a agreement with our details which which we both signed & he agreed to pay it back in installments of £300 each month via bank transfer.
However after 3 months of paying via bank transfer he stopped paying as he was struggling & needed more time so we agreed a couple of months break, Now it’s been over 3 years since the payments stopped & even though we are still in contact I’ve heard every excuse in the book but no payment I’ve even offered to lower the installments to £200 per month to which he agreed but no payment recieved as there is always a excuse on payment day.
Any advice will be be appreciated.
Thanks in advance.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
The article above goes through your options. Sorry, no easy solutions. A lot will depend on whether you think he could afford to pay you but is choosing not to, or if he may be in a real mess and doesn’t have the money. I suggest you talk to your local Citizens Advice.
Mandy says
Hi, my mum very sadly passed away in may this year , in Oct probate was finalised & I had a sum of money paid to me. I needed to pay a bill for £1610.66 via bank transfer somehow I ended up putting it in the wrong account, it should have been payee 16 in my list I paid payee 17 , this was fri 18th Oct I didn’t realise until the following Monday as soon as I realised I contacted the so called friend asking her to transfer it back , she had spent the lot told me she thought it was a universal credit payment .I she knew it wasn’t they don’t pay such large sums out , claims she couldn’t get online so got a balance from the cash point , she knew it was from me I know she could get online so would have seen my name next to the payment. Then went onto blame me saying well it was your fault, I agree yes it was a stupid mistake but you’ve spent it all in 2 days , I don’t believe you. Eventually she said I will have to pay it back in installments. My bank contacted her bank who in turn contacted her & she is now refusing to pay it. I have text messages from her saying she would pay it . What makes it worse is that she knew my mum had left me some money , it was not a loan to her or a gift had it been so I would have told her I was either lending it to her or giving it to her , she as far as I’m concerned has now stolen this money. I have also since found out she buys drugs with most of her money to ram up her nose. I really don’t know how to start getting this money back
Sara (Debt Camel) says
I suggest you go to your local Citizens Advice and ask for their advice.
sonya says
hi, i gave £350 to friend, £100 by bank transfer and £200 in cash, but he is not returning it. Can i make a police complaint or what course of action should i take against him. thanks
Sara (Debt Camel) says
The police won’t be interested, this is a civil matter not a criminal one. The article above looks at what your options are.
Lauren says
Hi, my mother and sister both owe me £2000 so £4000 in total, my mother said she would give £100 a month my sister said she would pay £150 a month. After a family fall out they both said they will not be paying me anything back. I wouldnt mind but the money was money I had put aside for my girls I lost my partner this year and I depend on the money to support my little girls
Sara (Debt Camel) says
That sounds very difficult for you. The article above looks at what your options are.
Chelsea says
Hi my ex own me 80 for the rent hat said he not paid me back
Sara (Debt Camel) says
It can be hard to get money back from an ex. The article above looks at what your options are.
M M says
Hi, if I brought and paid for something for someone with a shop catalogue account i have, with the agreement that they would pay me back for it and had it delivered to their address ( which I have proof of) , can I bring about a claim in the same way I would bring a claim for money owed?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Yes. These court claims are “money claims” which can be the repayment of a loan, or paying someone for goods or services. Here you have arranged for something to be delivered to their house and they have not paid you for this. If you go to your local Citizens Advice, they can explain in more detail.
Diane says
Hi there my nabour smashed into my mums car which caused £350 worth of damage to the body work that was 6 months ago I have had messages off them saying they have sorted it with garage but haven’t and I now have the garage that fixed my mums car on my back threatening to take the car for non payment and I am having to pay the garage myself can i sue my nabour to claim the money back off them using the message on social media that I recieved off them as evidence
Sara (Debt Camel) says
was your neighbour driving his car when he hit your mum’s car?
Brook says
I took a 16,000 loan out to pay arrears of my mother’s mortgage as she was at risk of losing the house, on the agreement she would put the house and everything in my name aswell as pay me back. I have proof of loan going straight onto her mortgage however no proof of our agreement. She’s now refusing to pay and says if I take her to court she’ll lie and say it’s my rent money. Although I have bank statements of the mortgage out my bank aswell. Is it worth taking her to court or will they just say as it’s my home address also just leave it and continue paying it off myself, thank you
Sara (Debt Camel) says
How much equity is there in the house? Is it cheaper for you to live there and pay half the mortgage than move out and rent?
Brook says
There’s quite a lot of equity, im unsure as to how much but there’s not long left on the mortgage, it’s cheaper for me to rent elsewhere, thank you for responding
Taylor says
In March 2019 I loaned my friend £5000 to help pay her debts off then a further £400 to pay for her mortgage. We never agreed on payments back to me once she had the money off me but she did set up a direct debt of £139 to go in to my account from the April. Which I was fine with as that’s all she could afford.
Once she put her house up for sale I made it clear I needed the rest of the money back in full as I was now struggling.
She had the money for her house and put it into a fixed isa then claimed she had no money to pay me back. So said she would sell her engagement ring as she longer with her partner to then change her mind and say she didn’t want to sell it and felt pushed into it. Yet she was the one who offered. I understand that ring has sentimental value to her so said if she didn’t want to sell the ring she didn’t have to but she would have to find a way to pay me as she claims she can’t take money out of her fixed isa.
I was struggling through Xmas so she did give me £200 then £300 so I could do my Xmas shopping.
Because I (rightfully) have kept asking her when I’m getting this money she then txt me saying she could turn around and say what money? If she wanted to. To which my reply was I can take you to a small claims court.
I have my bank statements and text messages as proof of what I’m owed and that it was a loan and not a gift.
Hasan says
Hi,
So last year my friend asked me for £500 which i ended up lending her £500. i took the money out the bank myself but have text messages to prove it. She said she would pay it back but didn’t have much money so i left it. after that she asked me for £750 for rent which i helped her with. i transferred the money to the rent collectors account. after that i sent her around £200 which is on bank statements and text messages and after that another £750 which is on bank statements. Now finally she begged me for £3,900 for a property which i gave and have it on text and statements also. None of this was a gift. she has recently sent back £4.900 but said she wont be sending me any more money. she owes me roughly £1,200. she gave me the money two days ago and was very angry. should i wait till she has calmed down like a few days then ask for remaining money or take legal action as this is a lot of money?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
it’s a difficult situation unless you know she has a lot of spare money. Read the article above and go to your local Citizens Advice for help.
Karlz Gibson says
My daughter has just confessed as to why she is constantly skint. Her recently ex boyfriend coerced her into getting a loan and a credit card, for his use, as he was unable to get credit. Up until the month after they split he was making the payments. My daughter left him, and on doing so had a verbal agreement (unfortunately) that if she left all none personal items, i.e. appliances household items they either got between them, or received as joint gifts, he would continue to pay. She also made the mistake of assuming he hadn’t meddled with her stuff between packing and collecting and he removed items he knew meant a lot to her.
My plan of action is to write a letter before claim, requesting either payment in full or back payment followed by installments to clear the owed monies. Assuming this fails, a letter requesting his attendance at mediation (if this is required) then small claims court. The amount he owes is in the region of £2,000. The loan was a guarantor loan, which went directly into his account, no monies were transferred to my daughter. The card may be harder to prove, unsure of when and where money was spent, but money was generally transferred to her from him to pay the bill.
Am I following the right route?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
There may be a MUCH better route for the guarantor loan. Could you please repost this on https://debtcamel.co.uk/amigo-complaints-by-guarantor/ and include the name of the guarantor lender please.
Karlz says
Unfortunately my daughter was the borrower, not the guarantor.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
sorry, misread what you wrote previously. In that case there is a different page for the borrower of a guarantor loan: https://debtcamel.co.uk/how-to-complain-guarantor-loan/. Please post there as this isn’t a straightforward case but there is something she can do.
Charlotte says
I lent my sister just over £4000 a few years ago. I got 3 repayments totalling £120 but after that nothing.
Recently, our Dad passed away. I was his full-time carer for the past 14 years and lived with him in the family home. My sister lives with her husband in a council flat and they are on benefits although she does a little part-time work. Dad decided to leave the house to me and his life savings and insurance policy to my sister. We were both happy with this arrangement, or so I thought. Once these are added together they come to just under £50000. As my sister was pleading poverty I took pity on her and loaned her another £5000 to tide her over until probate is granted. I thought that with that cash settlement she would be happy to pay me back both amounts but her recent comments and behaviour have led me to doubt this.
My question is this: am I entitled, as executor, to deduct the £9000 from the money she is bequeathed, or should I pay in full and ask her to immediately write me a cheque for the amount (I am not sure she will do this)? Otherwise, I will have to either write off the money or take court action as outlined above. Obviously, I want to avoid that as it will pretty much end our already flaky relationship.
Thanks in advance for any replies.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Sorry, I can’t give advice on what you can do as an executor. I suggest you talk to your local Citizens Advice.
James says
I lent a work colleague, 1000 to pay for his daughters 1st birthday in November, I have the receipt and he has promised for the last 12 weeks to pay the full amount, he transferred 500 a couple of weeks ago but now hes stopped replying and moved jobs. What plan of action would you advise to recoup the rest of the money?
Many thanks
Kind regards
James
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Why would anyone pay £1000 for a baby’s birthday party? Do you know his new job or where he lives?
James says
He hired out a bar and the cost of food drink. He still speaks to a number of my colleagues so I will be able to find out which company he is working for. I have the name of the building he lives in but not the number.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
So you lent someone money to buy other people drinks. I think you need to find out more about his circumstances then read the article above again and decide if you have any realistic chance of getting this money back.
james says
Hi hired out a a section of abar in Victoria London which had cannopays and champage which was free flowing for 3 hours. of which he was ment to pay for but didnt have the money totaling just over £1,000 pounds. It was for his daughters 1st birthday, he hired a phtographer, cakes, baloons so it was hardy buying other people drinks, he didnt want to tell his wife he didnt have the money so i stepped in to help. He then promissed me week after week to pay the money, he was on about 80k sallery so i know he can afford £500, plus he has just taken his wife and daughter away on holiday. He can afford to pay me, it was not a gift, he paid back half the money, he is in the UK, what else do i need to consider? Thanks.
Kevin Dobbs says
Hi a Freind of mine who is a financial consultant asked me to help him out with £5000 pounds which I did 2 years I keep asking for the money to no avail when he promised to pay back in 6 months what can I do
Regards
Kevin
Sara (Debt Camel) says
read the article above – that looks at your options.
Mr David says
Hi myself and my wife lent money to a friend of over £1600 not including interested this is over a year now ans still not had one penny back.
Last year he asked for £300 so he could get his 2nd car MOTed so he could sell it and give us our money back .
What he never told us he got it MOTed in August 2019 but still never tried to sell it the thing that makes me so mad is although there not in his name he owns 2 houses 2 cars and a Pizza business.
We are both disabled and are struggling with money our self’s now but still are no nearer to getting this money back.
The thing thats hard is he lives in Northern Ireland and we live in England.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
I suggest you go to your local Citizens Advice and ask for their help.
Sarah says
Hi
Over the last 10 years, I borrowed £70K from an ex-partner as I was out of work on and off and had other expenses pay etc.
I acknowledge the debt, and approached him to pay back a nominal amount to start with, and look to increase the amount as time goes on, as I am now back at work and my salary will rise. All seemed very amicable until he wanted me to sign an agreement.
I have started nominal repayments of £100 per month, but he wants me to sign an agreement to repay the whole amount within 4 years. This would be impossible. I’d be happy to consider 10 years. It has been agreed that no interest or other charges will be liable.
My concern is, could he take me to court to enforce the repayment length? I want to avoid an enforcement order/CCJ as I feel this would not benefit either party, as could effect my credit rating and impede my ability to buy a property etc in the future, which I could then borrow against to pay off the loan.
My question is what would be the best way to avoid an enforcement order/CCJ given that I am paying the debt off already? Would they succeed in taking me to court and winning?
Thanks.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
could effect my credit rating and impede my ability to buy a property etc in the future, which I could then borrow against to pay off the loan.
This sounds like wishful thinking. Houses are no longer magic money boxes you can borrow against.
If you are expecting him to take a “nominal” £100 a month while you save up and buy a property then I am not surprised he is not happy. How much could you actually afford to repay him at present?
Sarah says
Hi Sara
Yes wishful thinking on my part I guess.
All I can afford is £100 per month. I have no assets of any note. I can also verify my affordability If I needed to.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Then I suggest you draw up a budget and send it to him, showing that you can’t pay him more than £100 a month. Say you will contact him and increase this when you next get a pay rise.
It would cost him over £3000 to go to court for 70k. If you can show you are really are paying as much as you can afford, he may not feel like paying that amount.
Sarah says
Hi Sara
Yes, as part of the agreement (unsigned), I have agreed to an annual review.
He is very stubborn/spiteful, and I do fear court action. Assuming worst case scenario and he decides to take me to court (he is very affluent), is there a chance that I may get a CCJ/enforcement order against my name, given that I have acknowledged the debt and am making monthly payments?
Am I ok to continue to refuse to set an end date and continue with montly payments?
Thanks.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
is there a chance that I may get a CCJ/enforcement order against my name, given that I have acknowledged the debt and am making monthly payments?
yes.
Is your job in financial services?
Sarah says
Hi Sara
Yes it is Sara.
Also, we did share some family holidays & some items were given to me such as an exercise bike, a desktop computer etc. Would I liable for these gifts?
Thanks
Sarah
Sara (Debt Camel) says
You could point out that if you get a CCJ it may make your career impossible and you would then simply go bankrupt. But it isn’t clear that making this sort of threat to someone who is acting of of spite not financial consideration is sensible, it could backfire…
But you may want to consider if bankruptcy and possibly a change of career would be a better way forward for you rather than spending the next 10 years of your life repaying this debt. I suggest you talk to National Debtline on 0808 808 4000 about this.
Against a debt of 70k, I think extra for those sort of items is largely irrelevant.
Sarah says
Thanks Sara for all your replies, most appreciated.
kerrie whyte says
Hi Sara, I was contacted by a family member saying I owed her recently deceased father thousands in rent. I moved out in 2007 and there was no written agreement that I can remember as I was living with family. Do I have to pay this back even though I did paid rent-problem is I’ve got no proof of paying this from 2002-2007. She says he has written down all the amounts I owe him! Pretty shocked to be honest …
Sara (Debt Camel) says
That was a very long time ago. Did you think the money was a gift?
Kerrie says
I paid rent so I don’t know why he has written down amounts that I have supposedly not paid!!! I walked away from the family 13 years ago and it’s the first I’ve heard that I owe him rent and apparently listed other money he had leant me. So that may have been thought as a gift by me? He is family and I don’t remember him saying about what I owed. As I said – it’s come as a shock and I’m really worried
Sara (Debt Camel) says
So did he lend/give you money?
Kerrie says
No – but how do I prove that!!!! I have no bank statements from 13 plus years ago!!!!!!!!
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Many family debt situations can be complicated. There may be things you haven’t said because they didn’t seem relevant or you weren’t proud of them. You haven’t mentioned if he might be leaving you money in his will.
If you do think this could be complicated, then you need debt advice – that can’t be here, it has to be with a debt adviser who can go through things in detail. You could call National Debtline on 0808 808 4000 or go to your local Citizens Advice. Or if there is a lot of money at stake and you currently own some assets, it may be worth going to a solicitor and paying for a letter to be sent in reply.
But if the case is genuinely simple because you didn’t borrow any money from him or get behind with your rent, then you could decide to write the first reply yourself saying this. Point out he would have been in contact with you during the last 13 years if he did actually think you owed him any money. And say that because it has been so long, any alleged debt would be likely to be statute barred.
Kerrie says
Things I haven’t said or not proud of? How about being the victim of his abuse and managing to get away from his disgusting behaviour? He died intestate and that’s why I’m a beneficiary. I don’t want a thing from the pervert- I had my reward- a peaceful, normal life when I walked away until all this time later when I’m suddenly accused of debt; One last way of him getting to me from the grave. I will ring either the debt line or CAB- thank you.
Sarah says
I would just use the Statute barred stance. Don’t get stressed by it. Plenty of templates online.
Rich says
Hello,
Appreciate your support on my issue. Lent a friend & wife 10k (agreement signed, 2 copies) with a finite date of repayment within a year, during this time they asked for a further 3k, which we lent (& have agreement for). However all repayment agreements have been breached as have multiple clauses within to protect us. We’re now 6 months past due & are sure they cannot afford to pay but do have equity in their house. Do I have claim to charge over property (there is only mortgage as charge now) & instalments paid & release charge upon satisfying? Or, a clause within that they must pay back from equity upon remortgage? Thoughts and help appreciated. They are no longer friends and have been playing us (long story short). You support/advise on this is very much appreciated. We will be approaching them legally now to arrange something via courts.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
To get a charge over their property you first have to win a CCJ. After that you can try to enforce the CCJ and one possible route is by applying for a charge on their property. Given the sums of money involved you may want to consider advice from a solicitor.
Rich says
Many thanks. I’m thinking of the forced bankruptcy route but will be consulting with a solicitor.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
I hope your solicitor explains the costs of the application, the timescales and the very high level of the Official Receiver’s fees that are paid first, before any distribution to creditors.
Tom786 says
Hi, a friend asked for £4000 in December 2019 and said he will pay me back within Three months. He hasn’t paid a single penny back and he works as a manger in a bank. He gets paid more than enough to pay me back but hasn’t done so. It’s been nearly 6 months now and he just ignores my calls and messages what can I do? I have proof of the loan messages as he asked some of my other colleagues too and also the transfer which I had made to him stated ‘Loan’.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Read the article above for your options and the link to Citizens Advice on taking legal action against someone. If he works in a bank he may be keen to avoid a CCJ. so a letter Before Action may produce a good result. but if he can’t afford to repay the whole amount it may be better to accept monthly payments?
Tony says
[edited]
Sara (Debt Camel) says
I have deleted your comment as I don’t think you want that published on the internet. I suggest you talk to a solicitor or your local Citizens Advice as I think the threats you are suggesting could potentially be criminal offences.
BJM says
I took a friend of my son on holiday with us a years ago, and paid upfront on the understanding his mother would pay us back (£700).
They paid £200, and failed to pay anymore. When we had to pay the balance, the mother suggested he shouldn’t go because she can’t afford to pay the balance at that time. Cancelling then would have meant she would still lose the £200 as that waste deposit, so I offered to pay the rest and she pay when we get back.
I’ve not seen a penny since he came away with us. She promised to pay it back, gave all sorts of excuses for not being able to. Then started to block all my communication methods. In 2017 I started the process of claiming the money back via MCOL. She replied to me a few times via Facebook, then all of sudden disappeared again without paying anything.
I took the claim all the way to a bailiff visit, but that was returned as the person they visited at the address claimed not to be the person who owed the money
“She doesn’t live here!”
I later saw the individuals at the address, I have this morning tried to contact the court again to see what options are available. They have since told me as the warrant is over 12 months old there is nothing more they can do.
Any advice from anyone, should I go through the MCOL process again? Can I just go in an issue an order?
Thanks, B
Sara (Debt Camel) says
No you can’t start another court claim. I suggest you talk to a solicitor about how to enforce the judgment you have – if she has no money unless she has a well-paid job there may simply be no good options at all.
Nicolas says
Hello! I gave a person 2000£ over several transactions, and he hasn’t repaid anything so far, it has been over 6 months. I will take actions against him, but I was just wondering if there is a limitation period within which I have to do so ?! Many thanks .
Sara (Debt Camel) says
It would normally be 6 years in England, but when that period starts will depend on the details of your case.
Nicolas says
Does the six-year period apply for Northern Ireland as well ?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
I suggest you ask National Debtline on 0808 808 4000.
Ari B says
Hi,
I have lent my father lump sum of £15,000 by bank over 2 years of period ( I have proof with bank statements and reference including house repair etc) when he was building house in another country for house repairs, material etc. He promised (verbally) to pay once the house has been built which it has. 1 year has passed and he hasn’t paid anything back.
He also borrowed around £5,000 from my 2 sisters with the promise of paying them back as well and they haven’t received anything either.
He paid £3,500 but his refusing to pay the sum of £11,500 at this stage our relationship is not very good.
I keep requesting the sum if he can pay it with £200 per month but his refusing that aswell as making excuses such as ” I bring you to this country etc” I know that he has money to pay us back but his refusing to do so… What do you recommend us to do or what is best course of action for us.
Thank you
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Does he have any assets in this country? A well paid job?
Ari B says
Hello Sara,
He doesn’t own any asset in UK except a financed car agreement which he is paying the instalments monthly.. He is Taxi Driver working for Uber…
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Then he may not have the money to pay you. And if you win a court case, it may be hard to enforce the judgment.
Zoe says
Hi, I’m having trouble with someone I was buying a dog from. I’ve not met her in person but we’ve video called and spoken on the phone, I also have her address.
Anyway, due to sad circumstance we are not having the puppy. I paid a £250 deposit and an extra £200 to help with food cost. She said she’d pay back my money so I waited. The next day I had nothing from her so I called and text her a few times with no answer or reply. She then sent me a message saying she can give me £100 a week, I wasn’t very happy with that and she said either have that or nothing, I said fine I want it now please she said tomorrow. Well I waited all day and nothing, again, I sent messages and got nothing back.
What would you suggest?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
£100 a week will repay the debt in 5 weeks. There is no legal action you could take that would be faster than that.
Kel says
That is incredibly frustrating for you and in my opinion she is acting very badly. I would ring citizens advice and hopefully they can help further. Also, have a search on the internet to see if you can find similar situations to yours and how that person dealt with it. I really hope you get your money back. Best wishes xx
Judith says
Hi I loaned a friend quite a lot of money out of my inheritance £1170, here and there. I have kept all the messages that she sent me
Since then we have fell out and she refuses to re pay me.
What advice can you give me.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
no easy options – read the article above.
Zaara says
Hi, I gifted money of over £16k to my partner help him with a deposit to purchase a house via a bank transfer. This money was given to him as an investment towards a property for both of us to live in and we had plans to get married. I had to sign a gift letter in order for him to get a mortgage but he refused to enter my name into the property register so he is now the sole owner of the property I gifted money towards.
We are now having problems in our relationship and it looks likely that we will break up. The money was gifted to him for the purpose of us living there together after we got married but it doesn’t look like this will happen now. Is there any way I can take the money I gave him as this was intended for us to live in the house he purchased.
I have been paying for a lot of things and I contributed to some furnitures in the house too. I know this might sound naive on my part but I often felt pressured to give the money and to buy the furnitures, he would often threaten to leave me in some instances if I did not comply with his demands or if I did not help him. I felt coerced into this financial dilemma to help him and I often succumbed to his request because I had always believed we would marry one day and live there.
I am so stressed out over this as I don’t know what to do to sort this out or if have a legal case to stand on.
Please advise on what I can do, if any to pursue action.
Thank you.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
I think you would need to talk to a solicitor about whether you have any options here having said in writing that the money was a gift.
Zaara says
Thank you for replying. Would you be able to recommend any?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
no, sorry. You could see if there is a local Law Centre.
susan wiggins says
My son loaned his ex partner £2,000 to enable her to go on a holiday abroad as his sister was getting married. She has repaid £800 before they split but there is £1200 still to be repaid. She originally agreed to repay it in £200 instalments after she had paid off her car loan but has failed to do so. She is refusing to discuss the matter with him. She is a Police Officer and we have been advised by two solicitors to send her an email stating that we will report her to her sergeant as she is breaking their code of conduct and bringing the force into disrepute. She also had an affair during the COVID 19 lock down which again was against government guidance at the time; adults were asked not to engage in intimate relationships outside of their home as it posed a real threat to their existing partners etc. The solicitor has advised that if this perceived ‘threat to report her’ doesnt work, we should take her to small claims.
He has text messages etc that proves she still owes the money etc
Is he likely to be successful?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
I think if you are paying a solicitor you should take his advice as he will know the details about the case.
Nirjal says
Hi, I lent my mate £500 for his car repair on 11 Jun, it’s been over 2 months now, I’ve takenscreenshotof our msgs and also have bank transactions too. We agreed on him paying me £125 for 5 months so I’d be getting extra from him, but he’s not paid anything yet. He said that he had online bank issues and was just waiting on a code to be able to send the money, so I decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. Then after a week or two he msged me saying that he’s got his code and he’ll send it, I checked my bank multiple times and nothing was, I had told him too. I’ve msged him a few times now but he doesn’t acknowledge my msgs and won’t reply.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
The above article looks at your options. It might help if you offer to take less a month.
Peter snowden says
hi
I leant my friend some money over the years it totals to about £1100 and she keeps saying she has no money to repay me back is there anything I can do
Sara (Debt Camel) says
The article above goes through the options, it’s a tough situation.
PATRICK says
What about £9,700 remaining from £10,000 loan told me by text not paying me the rest back.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Can they afford to pay you back?
Amy says
Hello,
I started seeing this guy before the pandemic lock-down, where we booked several trips together. He booked the trips & I bank transferred him my half of the costs. Overall I sent this guy £1000 then during the pandemic everything got locked down and our relationship also broke down, he told me he would contact the places and get refunds for what we had booked. I have asked for booking references so I can chase this myself and he ignores me, I have never seen proof of anything that was allegedly booked. It has been months now and I have contacted him several times where he promises the money will be with me by a certain date and it never is.
I don’t believe anything was ever booked and I was scammed.
What can I do about this? I have conversations discussing the money owed, and bank statements showing me sending him the money.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Unless you think he has the money and is just refusing to pay it to you, there may be little you can do. See the article above for your options.
Aarron says
I have a signed agreement with an ex partner to repay £500 a month until a £3,639 debt is cleared but she has now made an offer of a lump sum of £3,000 and call it quits.
If I sign the new agreement and the payment isn’t received will this work against me if I have to submit a claim to the courts?
Sara (Debt Camel) says
what does the new agreement say?
Aarron says
The new agreement which I have received states I will be paid the sum of £3,000 with no further payment thereafter.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
Then you may want to change it to say that she owes you X, but you are prepared to accept 3k as a final settlement If this amount is paid before dd/MM/yy.
Sarah says
Hi,
I sent my friend £50 to purchase me a pair of trainers that she said she could get half price for me. At the time Of the bank transfer to her (£45 and £5 respectively labelled KG for the brand of trainers) we werE together in the same room.
She had come to be with me as I had just received the news that my baby had died at 36 weeks and I had to give birth to him. She proceeded to stay with me until I gave birth and then left the hospital the next day. At the time of ordering she had said that they needed to be delivered to her in order to get the discount.
A couple of days later she blocked me and has since refused to talk to me-I still don’t know what it is that I’ve done. I’ve sent messages from my sons number and Instagram account asking about the trainers and a refund (she also had keys to my house back home as I’m currently not able to be there given the current circumstances) and she has read them and ignored them all-even blocking them too.
I don’t know how to proceed with this because ideally I’d like my money back and also my house keys.
Sara (Debt Camel) says
I’m sorry, this sounds dreadful to have to deal with at such a sad time. You can talk to your local Citizens Advice about your options.